Page 163 of Rush
Everly takes a breath. "She told me you never wanted kids. That you told her multiple times you despise women who trap men into fatherhood."
Rage flares hot and immediate in my chest. I lock it down hard before it can show on my face, before it can scare Everly, but inside I'm fucking furious. Ciara cornered Everly when she was vulnerable and twisted my words, used my past against me to make Everly doubt us.
"When did she say this?" I ask, keeping my voice carefully controlled.
"Tonight at the clubhouse. She said she overheard me and Gráinne talking about the pregnancy."
I close my eyes and force myself to breathe through the anger.
"Did I ever say something like that?" I ask. "Years ago, maybe. Probably."
"You don't remember?"
"I might have. I don't know. But if I did it was before I met you, before any of this meant anything."
"So it's true?"
"Maybe, but that doesn't matter now. Whatever I said back then doesn't define who I am today or what I want."
She's quiet, and I can see her trying to decide if she believes me.
"Everly, look at me."
She does.
"I need you to hear this, really hear it. Whatever I might have said years ago when I was a different person doesn't matter. What matters is right now, in this moment. And right now I'm telling you that I want this."
"You're sure?"
"I'm terrified but yeah, I'm sure."
"Even though we've only been together properly for two months?"
"Two months and change," I correct her. "And yeah, even though it's fast and scary and I have no idea what I'm doing."
She starts crying and I pull her close again, pressing my face into her hair.
"I'm sorry," she says.
"For what?"
"For being scared, for letting Ciara get in my head, for not telling you right away."
"Don't apologize. You had every right to be scared. And I'm going to deal with Ciara."
"Rush—"
"I'm not going to hurt her," I say quickly. "But I am going to set boundaries that should have been set a long time ago. She doesn't get to manipulate you. She doesn't get to use my past against me."
"Okay."
We stand there holding each other and I try to process everything.
A baby. We're having a baby. The reality of it settles over me slowly, sinking in piece by piece.
We move to the couch and Everly curls against my side, her head on my chest. I can feel her breathing, steady and even now that the initial panic has passed.
"Tell me what you're thinking," she says quietly.
