Page 131 of Edging Coach
Lips barely leaving mine, he whispered shakily, “I’m scared I can’t have you the way I want to.”
“You can. You do.” I carded my fingers through his hair, then stroked it. “We have tonight. And after tonight, we’ll figure it out.”
“But we can’t…” His ragged breath gusted across my lips. “I don’t want to hide you behind closed doors. I want the world to know I love you.”
My throat tightened around my breath. I had no idea how to respond.
He swallowed. “And you. I want you to know that too.” He trailed his fingertips down my cheek. “But the League…”
“The League won’t be a problem anymore,” I said softly. “I’m not your coach anymore. I’m not a coach. At all.”
Devon drew back and stared at me, eyes wide and wet. “What do you mean?”
“End of the season.” I shook my head. “That’s it. I’m?—”
“Wait, you resigned? Like, completely?” He swallowed. “I thought… I thought you had an offer somewhere else, or?—”
“No. I love coaching. I do. But not enoughto give you up.”
He stared at me in disbelief. “But you… when you quit, you didn’t know if I’d—” He grimaced as his spine straightened. “And I didn’t even respond, and it’s been weeks, and you?—”
“Devon. Baby. Come here.” I drew him back in and caressed his cheek. “I meant what I said—I love you. Full stop. Even if you didn’t feel the same.”
“But you gave up yourcareer,” he whispered, his words as wet around the edges as his eyes.
“I’ve given enough of myself to hockey. I want to live my life on my terms now, and not have to worry about what the League or the fans or anyone else thinks. Even if we’re not together, I’m happy to give up coaching if it means no one finds out we slept together and tries to screw your career over with it.”
Devon winced, breaking eye contact. “You shouldn’t have to give up?—”
“I don’t have to. I want to.” I touched his chin and gently turned his head so he was facing me again. “My coaching career doesn’t mean nearly as much to me as you do.”
He searched my eyes. Then he pulled me in close and buried his face against my neck. I wrapped my arms around him and just held him much like I had when I’d arrived.
“Calisse,” he murmured after a while. “I wish I’d brought all my toys with me.”
I almost laughed at the sudden shift in conversation. “Why’s that?”
Drawing back, he swiped at his eyes, but he was smiling. “Because you deserve everything. And I wish I could give you everything tonight.”
My heart fluttered. I cupped his jaw and kissed him softly. “I have you.”
“Yes. You do.” He curved his hand behind my neck, and his kiss was much more fierce than mine. Morepossessive. God, I loved that. When he came up for air, he was out of breath, but his eyes were on fire. “When we’re back in B.C., and we have a night away from both our teams… fuck, Jack, I’m going to do so many filthy things to you.”
I bit my lip and nodded. “Please?”
His grin made me hot all over, both because of the promise and because we were stepping out of the heavy emotional territory. The mood hadn’t been killed, and the moment hadn’t passed.
Trailing his thumb back and forth along my jaw, he told me, “I’ll do everything to you. Everything you want. EverythingIwant. And then I’ll wake up in the morning and do it all again.”
A shiver ran up my spine. “God, yes.”
The grin broadened. Oh, I was so in for it when we were finally alone at home.
He slowly drew the tip of his tongue across his lips. “Do you still want me to tie you tonight?”
The fear that zipped through me almost made me gasp, but I just nodded. “Yes. Please.”
“Does it scare you still? Being bound?”
