Page 42 of The Duke's Promise to Her Child
When at last Nathaniel and Rhys had departed, he and James walked along the street in the direction of the park. It was a cold night. Their breath made small clouds in the dark air and their boots rang against the cobblestones, the sound carryingin the quiet of the late hour. The lamps along the street threw pools of orange light at irregular intervals, and between them the shadows were deep.
“Now that we are alone,” James said, “you can tell me the truth. There is something between the two of you, is there not?”
“There cannot be,” he replied. “She does not want a true marriage. She wants one of convenience. And truthfully, after what happened with Cassandra, I ought to be grateful for it.”
“Ought to be grateful is not the same as being grateful.” James glanced at him sidelong. “Though I will say this: you are going to make a cake of it, Gideon. I know you. You always do when you care too much about something to admit it.” He paused. “You must protect your heart. If you love her and she does not love you...”
“I do not love her.” He stopped walking. “There is no love between us. There is affection, friendly affection, and that is all.”
James raised his hands. “Very well. If you say so. I say only this: if there were feelings on both sides, something might grow from them. But if the feelings are yours alone, you must be careful. You do not want to find yourself in the same position as...”
“Helena would never treat me the way Cassandra did.” He said it quietly but without hesitation. “Helena did not want to pretend to be someone she is not. That is the very thing she objected to, the very thing she fought me on from the beginning. I know her. I know her mind. And her mind is made up: she will not havea romantic marriage. She told me so plainly.” He began walking again. “And truthfully, it suits me. I will be married. I will have done right by her father. People may think what they wish about it.”
“But you will have no heir.”
“Not for the title, no. But Lavinia will inherit everything not attached to the dukedom. I will raise her as my own. I will have the pleasure of a child without the trials of a marriage. That is enough.”
They walked on in silence for a while. The park gates were dark ahead of them, the trees beyond moving faintly in the wind. A cat crossed the street some distance away and disappeared between two houses.
As they walked, Gideon turned over what he had just said. It sounded, on paper, like the ideal solution. He almost believed it himself.
Almost.
He had to ask himself, in the privacy of his own thoughts, where the cold night air could carry the question away before anyone else could hear it: was it really enough?
He didn’t know. And not knowing frightened him considerably more than he was prepared to admit. He was in for it now, welland truly in for it, and there was nothing to be done but see it through.
CHAPTER 18
HELENA
Mary fussed over her the way she had before her first wedding. Every hair was perfectly in place. Her ribbon was tied beautifully, her dress without a single wrinkle, even though it was not truly a wedding dress.
Gideon had sent her to a dressmaker, but she had felt it foolish to order a gown she would wear only once, and so she had chosen something more understated. It was cream colored, with modest sleeves that looked humble enough, but it was satin, and satin could pass as a wedding dress if one did not look too closely. A silver sash had been threaded through her hair, which Mary had arranged into a pretty updo, and it looked rather lovely against her auburn. She looked at herself in the mirror. Mary had applied a little charcoal around her eyes and something to her lips.
She looked well. She was not going to deny it.
And still it all felt so strange. So wrong. She was to be married again. And to a Duke.
The scandal sheets had been full of stories about the two of them; they were the talk of the town. The young widow and the man who had so suddenly become a Duke, their hurried engagement and even more hurried wedding on everybody’s lips, as she had expected. She had thought about retreating from the whole arrangement multiple times over the past week. But she knew she could not. Gideon had been quite right. If she was married to a Duke, nobody could touch her. Nobody could touch Lavinia. Her daughter would have a future that was assured.
She could not drop all of that simply because it felt strange.
“Now look at me,” Mary said, and before Helena could react, reached forward and pinched both her cheeks smartly. “There. Now you look nice and rosy.”
“You remind me of my mother,” Helena said.
“Your mother was quite a few years older than I am.” Mary paused. “But I shall take it as a compliment.” She was quiet for a moment, smoothing an invisible crease from Helena’s sleeve. Then, “I know this is perhaps not the best time to ask, but I had wondered about my future.”
Helena looked at her. “Your future?”
“In an hour you will be Duchess of Blackthorne. His Grace already has a full household in town and another in the country. I had wondered whether there would still be a place for me.”
She grabbed Mary’s arm at once. “Of course there will be a place for you. There will always be a place for you. Do not be silly. I could not enter this new chapter of my life without you. It is unthinkable.”
The very idea was ludicrous. She released Mary’s arm and turned back to the mirror.
“I scarcely know what awaits me. I do not know how to be a Duchess.”
