Page 108 of Wedded to the Devilish Highlander
“He’d have more chance gettin’ one of our donkeys to dance with him than me maither,” Archer drawled.
Eileen laughed some more. She continued watching her brother as he made his way down the tables, quickly finding a young lass to dance with him. It warmed her heart to see him so happy, and she didn’t know how he had so much energy, with his injuries not fully healed.
“Me faither dinnae show much emotion when I was a wee lad, except for when we played instruments in the music room,” Archer said with some melancholy. “Even then, his music could be awfully serious. I remember when he took me ridin’ with him when I was still a bairn; he would always ride ahead, forcin’ me to catch up to him. He would look back at me with a sly smile on his face. I remember thinkin’ at the time that he liked to beat me. The wisdom of children is often nae wisdom at all.”
“So, why was he smilin’?” Eileen asked.
“He was smilin’ because he kenned if he pushed me hard enough, one day I would catch up and exceed him. He wasnae afraid of that; it was the end goal for him. Even when I was little, he could see it in me. Lookin’ back on it now, I see it as the greatest act of love.”
Eileen held his hand tightly in hers. She was overwhelmed by the love and respect he had for his father.
That will always be between us, will it nae? Ye still carry that in yer heart, and ye’ll always have the pain. It’s nae just me; it’s everyone in yer life. Ye cannae let anyone close, can ye?
“I’m glad we both had good faithers,” she said. “We both lost them too soon, but they gave us all they had before they passed.”
“Aye,” Archer sighed.
He picked up his cup of whisky and clinked it against her wine glass. They both drank in silence.
There was still time; that was all Eileen could think about. There was still time for him to confess his love for her, and they wouldn’t have to break off the engagement, and no one would ever have to know that it was a ruse all along, except for her brothers and Calum.
She didn’t even need his love. She could stay with him, and she would be a dutiful wife, and she could make that enough. She would love him, and even if he went back to his rakish ways, she would still love him. It would be enough to be near him, to live in the castle with him.
They would have children together, and they could be a family without really being a family. She’d heard of men and women who lived like that, especially lairds and aristocrats. She was sure it would be enough for her. It would be better than going back home and moving on, or being forced to wed someone she didn’t love.
She almost gasped when she realized that time had slipped by. She’d been waiting for so long that evening, and nothing had come of it. Now, Thomas stood up to leave, Archer went to escort his mother upstairs, and Reid said the worst thing possible.
“Come on, Sister, I’ll walk ye to yer room.”
“Aye,” Eileen muttered.
It was over.
Nay, I cannae let this be it.
32
Archer lay awake in his chambers. He didn’t know the hour, but it had been long since the sun had set. Every time he closed his eyes, he saw Eileen on the horse with Millar, the knife pressed to her neck. He saw her falling from the horse with Millar and miraculously not being cut.
If she had moved an inch, she would have been cut. She could have died. O’Gunn had not asked for her hand because he wanted her. He had asked for her hand to strengthen his position. He hadn’t kidnapped Reid and Eileen for any other reason than to hurt Archer.
Archer might have snuffed out the current threat, but more would arise, and they would use his weaknesses against him. That meant targeting his wife and his future children. That meant more loss.
He didn’t care what anyone said; if he had pushed himself a little more, been a little faster, and fought harder, his father might still be alive.
It’s me fault! It was me fault back then, and it’s me fault now, and I must take responsibility for that. Me responsibility is to the clan first, and I cannae let anythin’ get in the way of that.
He was fatigued but not tired, but he dared not close his eyes, or else he would see her again on the verge of death.
Ye deserve so much better than I can ever give ye.
The knock at the door was a welcome one, a distraction from his thoughts.
He sat up in his bed. “Come!”
The door creaked open, and Eileen walked into the room. His chest tightened, and his heart rate quickened.
“Is somethin’ wrong?” he asked.
