Page 39 of Shadow of Justice
“The way my dad manipulates my mom. My grandparents. He decides everything. Always has. My mom has always just deferred to him. Never argues with him.”
“Have you ever seen him get physically violent with your mom?” I asked.
“No. Not like that. It’s been more subtle. She goes to him for everything. She doesn’t keep her own bank account. She’s never worked outside the home. She did some online medical data entry for a while but when that started taking up her time, my dad made her quit. I don’t know why I never really questioned any of it. God. He does that. He just takes over. I’ve lived my whole life with him in charge. Until now.”
I wanted to be careful not to put words in Hayden’s mouth. I couldn’t afford anyone thinking I’d coached her. This case would greatly hinge on how well she could stand up to Bennett Cutler’s cross-examination.
“If I asked you about that on the stand, do you think you could give specific examples?”
“Of how he manipulates her? Yes. I just never thought anything of it. I didn’t know any better. But my mom doesn’t have friends of her own. Everyone they socialize with are people my dad is friends with. People he works with. That shopping trip she took when I found the box in the basement? She was with two wives of my dad’s friends. And she called my father practically every hour while she was gone. That was the first time I can remember her going somewhere without him. My mom has lived in and around Waynetown her whole life. She went to high school here. But she doesn’t keep in touch with any ofherold friends. For as long as I can remember, she never has.”
The more I knew about the Simmons family dynamic, the more I realized Ellie Luke had only been Jamie’s first victim, not his last.
“What about your grandparents?” I asked. I would not tell Hayden what they’d said about her. If they took the stand, she’d hear it soon enough. Let her reaction be genuine. Let the jury see it for themselves.
“They worship the ground my dad walks on. Even my grandpa. He runs every financial decision by my dad. When I was little, I remember going over there watching him balance their checkbook. If there was something in the house that needed fixing, my grandpa would call my dad and he’d call the plumber or the furnace guy. Whatever. It’s like they’ve all been children and he’s the parent. I don’t know why I never questioned it.”
“Hayden, you’ve been a kid yourself this whole time. Why would you question it?”
“That’s what my therapist says,” she said.
“How’s that going?”
“I don’t know. It’s hard. I cry a lot. But my shrink has been helping me realize how oppressive my household was growing up.”
“It’s going to take time,” I said. “You need to be gentle with yourself. None of this is your fault, Hayden.”
“I know. At least I think I know. I just don’t see how my mom and grandparents are ever going to understand who my dad really is.”
“As hard as it is,” I said, “you’re going to have to accept that it’s not your job to make them.”
She smiled. “My therapist said that too. She reminds me of you.”
“Thanks. I think.”
“I just … I’m sorry. I can’t help wondering if I’ve done the right thing. If I’d have just left that box where it was. If I’d just packed my things, moved away, never said what I believed. Just gone no contact sooner. Maybe that would have been better.”
“Do you really believe that?”
She squeezed her eyes shut. “No. I guess I don’t. He hurt Aunt Ellie.”
Hurt. That’s not how she described it before. I knew Cutler would capitalize on her phrasing if that’s what she said on the stand. Hurt doesn’t mean killed.
Hayden looked at me. “I know what he’s capable of now. Even if my family doesn’t. They can’t admit what he is because then they have to admit how wrong they’ve been. That they’ve let him control them. Then their whole lives since Ellie died is a lie.”
“It’s so much, Hayden. And you’re carrying the weight of it on your own.”
“What about that?” she asked, pointing to the petition.
I looked over Hayden’s shoulder. I could see out into the hallway. A familiar face had just walked in. Caro had thrown her arms around her. I quickly suppressed my own smile.
“I can’t get directly involved with this,” I said. “I’m still the prosecutor. But if you don’t want to go to the hearing on your own, I can recommend someone to go with you.”
“Okay. Thank you.”
I wanted to tell her it would be okay. Not to worry. But those would be empty words. There was no precedent for what Hayden Simmons would face. Though she looked frail, I knew this girl had a spine of steel. She would need it.
I walked Hayden down the hall to the employee exit. I didn’t want her leaving the building through the lobby. Though I hadn’t seen any when I came in this morning, I couldn’t promise there wouldn’t be a reporter or two lurking out there.
