Page 66 of Through My Eyes

Our eyes met.My heart did the same catching number that I was sure it would do for Peter until the day I died.Slowly and with deliberate steps, I walked over to where he stood.

“I didn’t know you were here,” he said a little apologetically, a little cautiously.“Have you been waiting long?”

I nodded.“The time was good, though.”I felt a tiny smile escape.“It gave me a chance to back out.”

Something like hope flared in his wonderfully luminescent green eyes, and only at that instant did it hit me that I had never once doubted he’d want me.I had never feared he’d change his mind.It was a tribute to the way I trusted him, to the way I trusted his love.

When he continued to eye me with a very cautious hope, it occurred to me that he hadn’t been as sure of me.He still didn’t know what my verdict was.It wasn’t that he trusted me any less than I trusted him, but that not once had I told him in words how I felt.

It was time.I raised a hand to his cheek, then slid it down and grasped the lapel of his topcoat.“I do love you, Peter.”

The hope in his eyes became less cautious and more sure, but it was still only hope.“What is it you want?”he asked in a whisper, as though he was almost afraid to say the words at all, let alone aloud, lest he didn’t like the answer.I understood.For all he knew, I could love him but not be willing to make the commitment he craved.

“I want,” I said taking a deep breath, “years and years of things like afternoons at the museum and weekends at the shore, long nights of loving and breakfasts in bed.I want a very small wedding, a house in the country with a studio out back, and two or three or four kids, or as many as is necessary until we get at least one of each sex.”

“One of each, eh?”he asked, grinning nowand pleased enough with my proposition to slide his arms around my waist.

I nodded.“I want a little boy to carry on the best of you, and a little girl to carry on the best of me.I think we’re both pretty special.”

His grin widened.“Y’do?”

I nodded, but I’d had enough of cuteness.My expression sobered.“I want us to be together always, Peter.I’ve felt only half-whole these past two weeks.I can live with making that deposit you wanted as long as you stick around to fill the void.”I paused for the beat of my heart.“Will you?”

The look on Peter’s face was so rich with love that he didn’t have to answer.But he did it anyway.“Will I ever,” he said with such feeling that I burst out laughing.It was a laugh of pure happiness, the first of many, many to come.