Page 54 of Rabid
He leans forward, his bent elbow propped against his knees, like he wants to get closer but he’s trying to respect the space I might want. My eyes drop to the leather of the couch as I curl my knees beneath me, as if I can curl up against the frenzy going on inside my mind.
“I feel like ever since the night of my Flux, I’ve been in survival mode. The need to fight is always right there under the surface, and thenyouhappened, and…” I shake my head, trying to find the right words as I sift through my jumbled emotions. “She wants you so intensely, and you keep telling me to trust her, but this is all so new. She’s either rabid and wants to attack, or she’s possessive and jealous, pushing me to claim you. I’m dealing with all the newness of being joined with a wolf. Navigating instinctual pulls thatIdon’t understand, in addition to my own shit. It’s so much to sort through. My mom just died, Tyran. And the betrayal and hate toward my old alpha and pack rides me every second of every day just on the coattails of my grief.”
Regret and guilt flashes past the murky depths of his gaze as he runs a hand down his face. “You and your wolf have been fucking amazing. You’ve had a lot of shit to deal with in the last several days—shit I had no idea about. That’s on me, but I’m fucking proud of you for being so strong.” My wolf preens at the pride in his voice while the human in me appreciates his contrition. “I wish I’d known. I wish I’d slowed down and justaskedinstead of assuming I knew what I was up against. I’m a fucking asshole, and I’m sorry, Vicious. I couldn’t understand why you refused to listen to your wolf. I thought you were just lashing out at me and Ruin Falls instead of seeing the potential here and rejecting me because of rumors started by wolves who would never understand what we’re about.”
The stark honesty in his voice quiets my turmoil. “Well, Iwaslashing out, but only because I was scared and hurt. I ran from Burke so I wouldn’t be claimed, only to dive headfirst into you,” I remind him. “I thought my wolf trapped me with an evenworsealpha, with a worse pack.”
His head bows beneath the weight of my words. “I didn’t help my case.”
My lips twitch slightly at his understatement. “No, you didn’t.”
“I guess your wolf didn’t either. It’s a fuck ton for you to process.”
He’s not wrong. “Yeah, I was angry and confused at her, plus dealing with her extreme reaction to every perceived threat. Meanwhile, she’s also pushing me every second of the day to claim you. Even right now, she’sright here, flooding me with her intensity and her...needs.” A blush heats my cheeks, and the marks on my shoulders seem to flush too, as if me admitting to the constant physical draw toward him has made the claiming marks perk up with want.
Across from me, Tyran’s eyes flash with hunger, his wolf rising up to the surface. But he takes a deep breath, suppressing whatever shot of desire I just caused. “I’m not saying this to rush or sway you in any way,” Tyran begins. “But some of that will settle,shewill settle, if you decide to finish the claiming.”
My wolf shoves up against me so hard that my arms prickle with her fur.
Claim him, she persists, her whine making my chest grow tight.
“Right now, your wolf is even more volatile because you haven’t bitten me back,” Tyran explains. “I think she might have wanted us to become mates right away that night because she senses that you both need it. Your rabid nature needs an anchor, and she marked me as what you both need.”
I nod slowly, thinking through his words before peering at him from under my lashes. “But will you?” I counter. “Anchor us? Be what we need instead of pulling shit like you did tonight? Can I trust you, Tyran?”
As if my words stoke a small spark of hope, he slides forward on the couch until he’s close enough to take my hand in both of his, stilling it between his touch. I hadn’t even realized I was fidgeting, my nervousness creeping into my movements.
He looks me right in the eye. He doesn’t flinch away, doesn’t waver like so many others have when they see the indisputable evidence of my unhinged and fractured soul. I realize that Tyran has never looked at me with a grimace or hesitation, despite the violent presence and constant threat apparent in my gaze. And right now, he’s stripped off his own alpha mask to let me see the honesty of the male beneath. “I swear to you, Vicious. I’ll be the monster your savage side needs. The safe place all of you deserves. I’ll be the male that grounds you always. Iwillbe worthy of your claim, and you can trust me implicitly. Just give me another chance to prove it.”
I didn’t realize until right now just how much I needed to hear that from him. My wolf whines again, her desperate noises making my eyes prickle. Tyran’s touch is a balm that soothes my hurts, and his words quiet the raging, rabid pain inside of me.
Mate, my wolf says.Claim. Trust.
I let out a shaky breath. “I’m glad to hear that.”
Mustering up my courage, stepping out on a fragile limb, I scoot forward until my knees press against his thigh. He looks down at the contact and then back to my face, swallowing hard as I lean in closer. His entire body goes tense, as if he’s physically holding himself back from moving or touching me. He’s letting me choose, letting me come to him.
I don’t stop until our faces are just inches away, until we’re sharing air, the heat of our breaths mingling against parted lips. My claiming bites are pulsing against my skin, spreading heat and need everywhere. My nose is consumed with his perfect scent, the earthen amber and woodsy cedar a path I always hope will lead me home.
“Don’t mess this up, Tyran Bauer.”
“I won’t,” he vows, his tone low but sincere, eyes dipping to watch my lips as they move.
“Good. Because right now, what Ineed, what my wolf needs, is for you to ground us. Because I don’t want to spiral anymore. Show me what it will be like to be your true mate,” I whisper, watching his throat bob. “And Alpha?”
His eyes drag back up to mine, voice gone rough. “Yeah?”
“Earn it.”
I fuse my lips against his a second later, stealing the surprised breath he sucks in. I kiss him like I’m diving straight into the deep end, trusting that even though I can’t see the bottom, he’ll be there to guide me just like he’s promised.
Tyran pulls back, cradling my face with his hands. “Tell me what you want, Vicious.”
“You and me,” I answer without hesitation, trusting in the instinctual pull I feel between us, and hoping like hell this is right. “I want it to be you and me.”
He seems to understand what I mean, because Tyran wraps his arms around me and pulls me into his lap until we’re pressed together as close as two people can be. And then he kisses me like there’s only us in the entire world and nothing else. He kisses me like a male starved for his mate, like a male as desperate for connection as I am.
I writhe on top of his lap as he takes my mouth. His cock hardens beneath me, and I grind down, stealing a groan from his throat as his shoulder muscles bunch beneath my fingers. My body is a lit match slowly being consumed by the fire inch by inch. My stomach flutters with hope and yearning, and every part of me feels like it’s falling into every part of him.
