Page 21 of The Deal Breaker
“Brett thinks so, too. Earlier tonight, he helped me with a budget to follow while I’m in school to make sure I don’t run out of money before I graduate.”
Dash stared with an expression of disbelief. “Don’t go, Iris. Not having a place to live is a sign this isn’t the right time. Wait another term. The fall would be better, or a year from now. I promise. We’ll figure this out together.”
“I’ve waited long enough, and I have a backup plan if I can’t find another apartment.”
That muscle ticked at his jaw again. His eyes were dark and serious. “You’re one step from being homeless again.”
That wasn’t fair. “No, I’m not. I have savings.”
“Not enough if Brett needed to help you with a budget.” Dash’s gaze locked on hers.
“Henry suggested I speak with Brett.”
“I’ll help you. Whatever you need.” Dash’s voice was hoarse, unnatural. “Just…stay.”
“I can’t.” She’d expected him to be upset but not to push back like this. “This is my dream, Dash. You were so excited and nervous when you started your company. That’s how I feel now.”
“I need you.” His voice cracked. His eyes gleamed. “You’ve been the one constant in my life for the past fifteen years.”
“Twelve,” she corrected softly. “The last three haven’t been the same.”
“I messed up. I know that. And I’m sorry.” His gaze implored her. “I’ll make it up to you. I can’t lose you, Iris.”
“Oh, Dash.” She held his hand and squeezed. “You’re not losing me. I’ll still be in Portland.”
“We’ll never see each other.”
“We don’t now.” She wasn’t being flippant, just honest. “You work, go out with Raina, see the guys, and play your video games. We hardly eat meals together or bump into each other these days.”
“Raina—”
“There were others before her.” Iris kept her voice steady and calm. She didn’t want to upset Dash more, but she needed him to see things how they were. Not how he thought or wanted them to be. “And you’ve become closer to others.”
You don’t need me the way you didwas implied but unspoken.
He nodded once before seeming to catch himself. “I want to spend time with you.”
“You have my number.” Which he used to text her, never call. Dash wasn’t one for talking on the phone.
“I’m sorry.”
“You have nothing to be sorry about.” Iris meant that. “I know this isn’t what you want, but I’m ready to see what comes next.”
“I didn’t mean…” He rubbed the back of his neck again. “We had a deal, but I let you down. I knew you’d be around, so I didn’t put much effort into our friendship. And at Christmas…”
She patted his hand. “Don’t be sorry, Dash. I wasn’t ready to do this before. Now, I am.”
“You may be ready, but I’m not. Please tell me what you need.”
She’d never asked Dash for anything because she didn’t want him to think she was like his parents, who always wanted money. This year was the first time she’d cashed one of his bonus checks. Henry had told her that she deserved it and could use the money to follow her dreams.
“Nothing,” she said finally. “But thanks.”
He wiped his eyes.
“It’s going to be okay,” she added.
“None of this is okay.” He spoke so softly she could barely hear him. “I didn’t mean to hold you back.”
