Page 48 of Searching for Beautiful
I look at him, trying to figure out if he’s joking or not, but I can’t tell. I realize I kind of want him to be leaning toward not. The thought of going inside and opening my books and working alone puts a weight in my gut. Today I’ve felt almost like the old me, and I don’t want to let that go.
“What are you going to do?” I ask, trying to sound much more relaxed than I feel. It’s such a simple question, but it’s also putting myself out there.
“I have to grab some food to bring down to the center for Mom. ”
“Do you like going?”
He shrugs. “Sometimes. I used to hate it when I first started talking to a counselor in our old town. Now it’s okay most of the time. It helped. There are days I don’t feel like it, though. I know you saw me there. ”
My eyes dart to my lap. “I was a bitch to you that day. ”
He huffs. “It wasn’t your best day. That wasn’t all it was, though. Sometimes we just have bad days, Bryntastic. It goes with the territory of living. ” He raises his eyebrows. “I read that in a book, too. ”
I swat his arm. “You are so crazy. ” Pause and then go with my gut. “Are you sure you don’t mind if I go with you?”
“I don’t know… Not sure if I want to be seen with ya. ”
“You suck. ” I cross my arms and pretend to pout before I realize what I’m doing. That I’m teasing him the way I would have before.
“Plus, my mom would kick my ass if I told you no. ”
“That’s because she’s smart. ”
“And you’re smiling,” he says before he gets out of the car, without giving me a chance to reply. I’m happy for it. Glad I don’t have to make excuses or feel bad or stress about having fun. For the first time in a long time, I just want to try to do it.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Now
It doesn’t take long for Christian and me to grab the food and drive to the center. We go through the back and I help him carry everything inside. People hurry around, shouting orders and laughing and talking. It feels good to be a part of it. To help with whatever random reason they’re using to throw another party.
It’s cool that they plan so many get-togethers. It must help the people who have nowhere else to go. People like me, I guess.
Christian looks over at me and gives me a little head nod. My legs go weak. Catching my foot on something—I don’t even know, my other foot, I guess—I almost trip.
“I don’t remember you being this clumsy. You almost ran me over the first day I came back and now you’re tripping all over the place,” Christian teases.
I roll my eyes at him. “I’m not clumsy. ” And I’m not, but it’s pretty impossible not to trip when Christian Medina looks at you the way he just looked at me.
When he leans toward me, I freeze, unable to move. Warning bells go off inside me. He’s getting close. Too close. I haven’t had a boy close to me since Jason.
“Maybe I just have that effect on you,” he whispers close to my ear.
Author: Nyrae Dawn
I jerk back.
Christian’s eyes crinkle. “I was just playin’ around. I didn’t mean anything. ”
Oh God, I freaked out and hadn’t even realized it. I’m so tired of this. “I’m sorry. It’s not you. ” I playfully return the nod he gave me. “Should we go to the main room?”
He shrugs, and I wonder if I’ve offended him. We walk through the kitchen and into the main hall. At the end of it is the front room where they hold all the major events. It’s packed with a lot of the usual kids I see here and some new faces, too.
“Brynn! Christian!” Brenda’s voice rises above the noise. She happily jogs over to us before pulling me into a hug. “Good to see you here, mija. ”
“What about me? Is it good to see me here, too?” Christian asks.
“Of course it is. You know that. ”
