Page 22 of Just for the Cameras
Christ.
OC:I ask because yesterday I fell into a pile of giraffe shit, and I can still smell it.
On the other hand…hearing about OC falling into shitisappealing…
Graydon:Face-first?
Please say yes.
OC:You wish!
Yeah, I really fucking do.
Graydon:So you didn’t eat shit?
OC:Ha…HA! <—note the sarcasm. No, but thanks for your concern. I sat in it.
Bennett:At least sitting in it made your ass smell, which is better than your face.
My lip tugs up because look at the young one chiming in. Didn’t even think he had a personality.
OC:Don’t want my ass smelling either. Don’t want anything smelling.
Graydon:Maybe stop playing in giraffe shit then.
Bennett:That would be my suggestion as well.
OC:Normally, this kind of chatter would piss me off, but…look at us bonding.
Graydon:And you just ruined it.
OC:No, don’t leave. I think…I think we need to help each other out. I don’t know about you, but doing zoo chores wasn’t on my list of ways to improve the public perception of my team. It only feels like a way to make people laugh at us.
Well, look at him. He does have a fucking brain.
Bennett:Yeah, I’m not doing much. Just sitting and reading facts about lions.
Grumbling under my breath, because I don’t want to bond but it seems like they’re in the same headspace as me, I text back.
Graydon:I washed dishes yesterday.
OC:How dare they make a man of your stature perform such aninconsequential task that could wrinkle your fingertips.
Graydon:Seconds from blocking you.
OC:Fine, but I want you to remember just how concerned I am for your fingertips. Washing dishes…preposterous!
Bennett:I’m not concerned about your fingertips.
Graydon:That’s how I prefer it.
OC:Stop, we need to focus. This is serious. I think we need to hold a meeting, get a grip on what’s going on.
Graydon:Already tried that with my coach, didn’t go over well.
Bennett:I’m in the middle of my season. I can’t be wasting time reading facts about lions.
OC:Exactly, there needs to be structure, there needs to be accountability, and above all else, if I’m sitting in giraffe dung, there at least needs to be a camera crew following me so I can get the public on my side.
