Page 217 of Just for the Cameras
Bennett:I’m not leaving the Gladdy Daddies.
Graydon:Not the correct thing to say.
OC:*Exhales loudly* Thank God.
Bennett:I felt the exhale from here.
Graydon:Yeah, someone forgot to brush his teeth.
OC:First of all, I have excellent oral hygiene, I’m constantly cleaning the silverware…if you know what I mean. Second, my nipples got a little hard from you making a joke, Graydon. We are wearing you down.
Graydon:I’m about to block you.
OC:But you won’t.
Bennett:Can we get back to the silverware thing? Are you talking about your tongue?
OC:Yeah, because that’s how I eat…you know…a woman.
Graydon:If I was a dick, I would say no wonder Grace is engaged to someone else, but I won’t go there today.
OC:Uh…you just did. You still said it without saying it.
Graydon:But technically, I didn’t say it.
OC:Doesn’t mean it doesn’t still hurt. You owe me a hug.
Graydon:Over my dead body.
Bennett:I mean, I think he deserves a hug.
Graydon:Did he tell you how he forced himself upon me, slept on my couch, and then counted the number of times I had sex with Maple that night?
Bennett:Dude…
OC:In my defense, I got them pastries for breakfast the next morning.
Bennett:Doesn’t matter. No hug, but the comment evens the playing field now.
OC:I’ll take it. BTW…it was six times.
Graydon:I will rip your goddamn head off.
OC:Which head? I have two.
Graydon:Blocking.
OC:Wait, we have yet to find out about the book club. Don’t you want to hear what Bennett is up to?
Graydon:I’ll text him separately.
Bennett:Now, now, let’s not get too hasty. OC is going through a crisis and is extra annoying. I think we can all agree upon that.
OC:I’m even annoying myself, if that helps.
Bennett:See, it’s not just us. He’s suffering too.
Graydon:Why are you so adamant about keeping the Gladdy Daddies?
