Page 33 of Fox (Road Rebels MC 4)
“You have to breathe. When you can hear me, nod your head. You have to breathe. When you can hear me, nod your head.”
I nodded my head against the warmth on my forehead. I drew in deep breaths through my nose and let it out through my lips. The more deep breaths I took, the more centered I felt. The stronger my body became and the closer the sounds of the daytime were to my ears. The wind was kicking up, and birds were chirping in the distance. The sun felt hot on my skin, and Fox’s strong grip became reassuring instead of numbing. I fluttered my watery gaze up to him, taking in the worried stare he was giving me.
“Come on. We’re going back to my place. There’s a bath waiting just for you,” Fox said.
Then he slipped onto his bike, helped me wiggle behind him, and I clung to him as we rode back to his apartment.
Chapter 29
Fox
The shock that hit Harlow at the lodge was normal. I could remember the first time it ever happened to me. The night of the shoot-out with The Devil’s Saints six or seven years ago. I was good at the moment. Protecting my own and taking out as many of those fuckers as I could. But when all was said and done, and the sand was soaked with rivers of red, I had curled up into a ball in my room and rode out my first panic attack.
Alone.
And scared.
And wondering what the fuck I’d gotten myself into.
I wasn’t gonna let Harlow do this shit alone. I knew what it was like to do it alone, and it hardened me in a way that still affected me today. I made a promise to protect her, but that didn’t mean just from the shit I caused. It meant from the aftershocks of the shit that happened to her. She was beautiful and free and full of life and light. I wasn’t going to let that darkness grip her by the throat like it had me. I would stand between the barrier of the light and the dark to make sure I could always fend it off for her.
To make sure I could always protect her from it.
She held me so tightly it was hard to breathe. I had to inhale with lungs instead of my stomach just to get enough oxygen while we were riding. Her body was still trembling, and I had to take turns slower than usual. The last thing I needed was her sliding off my bike and going tumbling to the ground.
We pulled up to my apartment, and I parked my bike. I gathered her in my arms, not wanting to chance her weakened legs as I carried her up to the door. I slid it open and walked her through the threshold, then sat her in a chair before I could go back and shut it. Her eyes were darting around, taking in her new surroundings as I shrugged off my coat and turned on a couple of lights.
“I’m gonna go draw you a bath,” I said. “Sit there and keep taking deep breaths.”
She didn’t say anything, but I could hear her taking long, slow breaths through her nose.
I brushed by her, my eyes locked onto the bathroom door. I needed to get her body relaxed. If she stayed tense like this, it was going to throw her into another panic attack. I turned on the bathroom light and raked the shower curtain back, then searched around for some bubbles. The only thing I had was some fucking hand soap, but it smelled good enough, so I dumped it into the tub. I turned on the hot water, getting a good steam in the room before I tempered it with some cold, watching as the bubbles built on top of one another.
Then, I went in search of Harlow.
She was no longer sitting in the chair but standing at the window in the kitchen. She was gazing out over the forest and the little bit of water I had running in what was pathetically considered my backyard. Her hands were crossed over her chest, and she was shuffling from foot to foot.
She was beginning to panic again.
I walked up behind her and gathered her against my body again. She came willingly, almost like she was giving into the path I had for her. Harlow’s fragile body curled into me, and she seemed smaller than ever. Her strength was dwindling, and I knew she would cave soon.
I sat her down on the edge of the tub and began to undress her. Her shoes. Her dress. Her underwear. All of it came off as she sat there, staring over my shoulder. Her eyes were blank, and she was teetering again. I pressed a kiss to her shoulder, trying to get her to come back to me as she turned her lips and pressed a chaste kiss to the side of my head.
“I’ve got a hot bath for you to take,” I said.
I slid her in, watching as the soapy bubbles encompassed her body. I turned off the water and watched her soak as I removed the hair clip from her hair. It tumbled down into the bath, soaking the ends of her tresses as she sighed and slipped deeper into the comforting water.
But then she wrapped her hand around mine and pulled.
“I’m not going anywhere,” I said. “I’ll stay right here.”
Her eyes panned over to mine as they continued to widen with fear.
“Get in with me,” she said.
I brought her hand to my lips to kiss before I stood to my feet. I quickly took my clothes off, casting them to the side as her eyes ran over my body. I allowed her the moment. To take me in and study me the way she probably wanted to all along. She leaned up in the tub, allowing me room to get in behind her as I slid my massive body into the confines. The water came up so far it trickled over the sides, but neither of us cared. I spread my legs and felt her lean back into me, her legs curling up and her hands wrapping around my waist.
She tucked her head underneath my chin as her body relaxed against my touch.
“I’ll always keep you safe, Harlow,” I said. “So long as you’re with me, you will never be hurt.”
“I wish my father could’ve kept that promise,” she said.
“I can’t imagine how hard this is for you to wrap your mind around.”
“No, you can’t,” she said. “But I’m going to help.”
I looked down at her as she tilted her head up to meet my gaze.
“You will?” I asked.
“In any way, I can. It might be my anger talking, but my father is partially responsible for what happened today. And whether or not I had been there, that’s unacceptable. Completely. No one should ever have to endure something like that. No matter what they’ve done with their lives or in their past.”
“That means you won’t get rid of me too easily,” I said.
“Why would I want to do that?”
“I don’t know. Figured you’d run for the hills after what happened today,” I said.
“Why would I run from someone I’m falling for?” she asked.
It took me a moment to process what she said before I could respond.
“Falling for?” I asked.
“Yes. That’s what I said.”
She moved around in the tub, sloshing more water out of it as she straddled my lap. She perched herself on my body, her arms threading around my neck. I tried to keep my hormones at bay. I tried to ignore the warmth of her pussy against my cock. I tried to ignore how my hands melded into her hips perfectly. How her curves accepted the strength of my muscles fluidly.
“I love you, Fox. No man has ever protected me the way you’ve done in the past few days. Not even my own father. I’m not letting go of that.”
“W
e’re very different people. We come from very different worlds,” I said.
“Then I guess our worlds are about to collide. Laiken said something about testifying. Looks like I’m gonna have to do that. Face it, Fox. You’re stuck with me. I survived a firefight just to see you again. Tough shit if you don’t like it.”
“Strong words coming from such a sweet little mouth,” I said with a grin.
I cupped her cheek, allowing my thumb to trace her bottom lip. I knew how crazy it sounded even before it left my body. How weird this was going to get and how hard it was going to be to juggle Harlow’s life and mine.
But she was right.
Our worlds had collided, and I’d fought that firefight simply to save her. Not the guys. Not Gemma, Sydney or Emery. And certainly not Laiken.
Her.
I fought through thick and thin today to save her.
“I love you too, Harlow.”
She fell into my body, our lips colliding with desire. My cock rose instantly between her legs, seeking the warmth it could only find with her body. Her arms pulled me close, her soapy breasts pressing into my chest. My hands squeezed all of her excesses, taking in her gorgeous body as her hips rolled down into mine.
Our tongues battled for dominance as Harlow rose up in my lap. I grabbed the base of my cock and held it upright, waiting for her to plummet down onto it. I needed her. I needed her like I needed air. Our chests were heaving for oxygen as our lips swelled underneath the pressure of our desperate kiss, and once she broke our connection, I felt her pussy settle onto the tip of my cock.
“I love you,” she said in a whisper.
“And I love you.”
She sank down onto me, her body parting for my girth as I slid into her warm depths. I could feel her juice slicking my skin as the water of the tub sloshed over the edges. Her legs were shaking, and my toes were curling. She was so fucking tight for me. So juicy and wet. My lips attacked her neck as my hands rounded down to her ass, gripping her cheeks and rolling her deeper into me.
