Page 25 of Killian (The Doherty Mafia)
I couldn’t help but wonder if I’d hit a nerve with him somehow.
Maybe it was the afterglow of having three orgasms in a row—which was still freakin’ unbelievable. But there was something about him, or maybe the way our conversation progressed, which made me reveal more about myself to him than I’d intended.
Why did he care about my story?
Why did I care to tell him? Even though there were only hints and I just scratched the surface, I had been more open and honest with my captor than I had been with anyone in years.
Maybe because this was the first time in a long time that somebody had bothered to ask. Besides, I had nothing to lose. He already had everything. My freedom. My body. Why couldn’t he have my mind too?
I’d put on my clothes again and resumed sitting in the corner, rocking myself back and forth, trying to make sense of everything that was happening to me.
I’d tried to run away a couple of times already. I had all these plans and I executed them, but each one failed. I was being an idiot by presuming I could somehow outsmart this guy.
He clearly knew what he was doing.
So maybe the answer didn’t lie in trying to get away from him. Maybe my best option right now would be to stay exactly where I was.
I hadn’t thought about a plan for what I’d do if I escaped. Where would I go? I didn’t have any money. I didn’t have skills. I didn’t really have an identity at all. Aldo had stripped me of all that a long time ago.
My only option would have been to return to my stepfather, and how would that look? What would he do to me when he found out what happened to Connor?
I was the one who pulled the trigger. I killed that man.
I disobeyed Aldo.
My throat was dry. I was rocking hard. If anyone saw my eyes right then, they’d agree I was losing my mind. The thought kept running through my mind—maybe Killian was my only chance of survival right now.
Besides, he actually wanted to talk to me. Other than the fact that the sex was amazing, Killian seemed genuinely interested in getting to know me. Would it be that terrible to try and get to know him too? Try to figure out what made him the man he was?
He had me locked up in his basement, with ample opportunity to really harm me. Instead, he brought food, towels and chocolate. We had both given to our desires because the attraction between us was definitely real.
Maybe it wasn’t such a bad idea to just wait it out here and see what happened next.
Maybe, maybe, maybe…
* * *
Maybe I could finally trust someone the way I trusted Charlie?
I pressed my eyes close and tried to picture him standing in front of me. Those familiar arms. That warm smile, his boyish grin. The way his dark hair fell over his eyes and he had to keep pushing it out off his face. But when I tried to picture his face, I couldn’t do it.
Charlie’s memory was fading, and the thought of that made my eyes fill with tears.
What had Aldo done to me over the years? He’d forced me to forget the one person who had brought me joy in this life. The only person I had been able to trust.
My mind went there—to that night when everything was revealed. I fought against it because I knew that the memory of that night would break me. I needed to stay strong and stay away from revisiting the past.
I couldn’t.
I could see myself sitting in bed, reading a book by my bedside lamp. I had my bag packed and hidden away underneath the bed. I was ready to go in two days. Charlie and me. Together forever.
And then, there was a knock on my door. I sat up straight, expecting it to be my mother. She sometimes came to my room, but never to check on me. She used to come because she wanted to hide somewhere while she cried, so Aldo wouldn’t see her and make fun of her.
Instead of mom though, it was Aldo who stepped in. Even before he spoke, he was shaking his head like he wanted me to see how disappointed he was with everything.
I just stared at him in silence. My heart raced in my chest. My palms were clammy. I knew something big was coming. This couldn’t be good. The only reason for Aldo to be in my room was a bad one.
“What are you doing, Reese? How could you be so stupid to think you could trick me?”
My eyes popped out of my head. I just wanted to know where it was headed. Where was Charlie?
“I…”
“Don’t you fucking deny it!” he barked at me, swiping his hand through the air, slapping me across my face. My head smacked to the side and I felt a red hot pain searing my cheek. I wanted to cry out and scream for help but I knew it would only make things worse.
