Page 53 of Full Tilt

Connor:

Camden, don’t do it. The man once got a guy’s post code and showed up with homemade banana bread and a six-pack.

Cosmo:

And he ate all of it, so you’re welcome. Also, banana bread is a love language.

Brayden:

What isn’t a love language in your world?

Cosmo:

Chaos. But like, affectionate chaos.

I sigh and give in, thumbs flying across the screen.

Me:

Exeter.

Cosmo’s response is immediate.

Cosmo:

NO WAY.

Cosmo:

My big brother just moved there a few weeks ago.

Cosmo:

You two should totally meet. He’s been kind of a lonely bastard lately.

My eyebrows shoot up.Oh no.

Cosmo:

Actually, he’s been talking about someone he’s into…

Cosmo:

Thinks it’s unrequited.

I jerk forwards a little.

Cosmo:

Maybe you could keep him company until his next visit home. You could totally step up and be the big brother he never had.

Cosmo:

Obviously you can’t keep him. Well, unless you delve into a world of incest.

I choke on nothing—just the idea of that message lodges in my throat like a brick. I slap the phone facedown on the kitchen counter and stare at it like it just insulted my entire bloodline.

Fuck my life. Cosmo is matchmaking me, right?