Page 46 of Striking
Caitlin cocks a brow. “He won his game yesterday. I guarantee I’ll get at least three orgasms before I pass out tonight. Love you.”
I keep my eyes trained on an amused Rhys and smile before ending the call.
“Caitlin?” he asks as he scoops me out of the chair, then moves to the couch and sits, cradling me in his lap. We might not spend enough time talking, but what we lack in verbal communication, we definitely make up for with physical communication.
As if on auto pilot, I loosen his tie and unbutton his top two buttons. “She’s right, you know. I have a job and a life I’m ignoring. I’ve got to deal with both eventually.”
The admission leaves me feeling hollow inside, and I’m not sure why, but I think it has something to do with the idea of leaving Mornea. Of leaving him. It makes no sense, but it’s there all the same.
“Even if you were to go back to Kroydon Hills, you couldn’t go back to your job, love. It would be far too dangerous. Once the world knows we’re married, you’ll need around-the-clock security.” His fingers twist in my hair, and I swear I watch the tension ease from his shoulders at the small act of intimacy
I love knowing I can give him that.
Even if I’m going to take it away with my next breath.
I run my fingers over his temple, playing with the tiny flecks of golden-blond dotted with the tiniest bit of grey. “I’ve given you the week, Rhys. I’ve stood by while you dealt with everything that went into the funeral and your new reality. I’ve stayed hidden, even from my friends while they were here. I’ve kept my siblings and my best friend at arm’s length. Which isn’t easy, but it’s what we needed. I’m sorry, but this conversation can’t wait any longer. I know you have so much on your plate right now, but I don’t think that’s going to change, and I can’t keep living in limbo.”
“Fuck, Bellamy. I didn’t realize—” He drops his forehead to mine. “You’re right. Let’s talk.”
Well, that’s not what I was expecting to hear.
I’m not sure I’ve ever dated anyone who’s willing to take ownership when he’s wrong.
Guess that’s the difference between dating boys and dating a man.
Not that I’d call getting drunkenly married dating.
“You’re going to have to let me off your lap,Your Highness.” I press my hand to his chest and push back, but his arms tighten around me.
“Why would I want to do that?”
The teasing tone to his voice surprises me and puts me at ease at the same time. “Because I can’t think when you’re this close, Rhys.”
He drops his hands immediately, and I force my legs to work. Because as much as I want to think, I like having his hands on me even more.
Maybe one day I’ll understand the magnetic pull we have between us.
Too strong to ignore.
But is it enough to build a marriage on?
“Tell me what you want, Bellamy.” He sounds so sure. Of himself. Of me. “I’ll give you whatever I can.”
“But not a divorce?” I regret the words the minute they’re out of my mouth, and that might be the most confusing thing. “You can’t give me that.”
His body stiffens as a mask slides in place. One I haven’t seen before. “Is that what you really want?”
I want to say yes. But the problem is I realize that’s no longer true. Not exactly.
“I don’t know what I want. I wish we could explore anuswithout being married, but we both screwed that up already, didn’t we?” I step between his spread legs and meet those sapphire-blue eyes.
“What do you know, little bee?” His sleep-deprived voice scratches along my skin, and I want to take his hand in mine and force him into bed for a week until the exhaustion is cleared from his eyes and the world has settled around us.
“I know I’ve never wanted anyone else the way I want you. I realize it doesn’t make any sense because we barely know each other.” I drop to my knees in front of him and cup his face in my hands. “But part of me doesn’t care.”
“Nothing about my life is ever going to be easy, Bellamy. Life as my queen won’t look anything like a fairytale.”
“Mylife has never been easy, Rhys. I’m not a pampered princess, and I wouldn’t want to be treated like one now. Would I be able to work?”
