Page 91 of Promise Not To Fall

“You’re not scared?”

“Me? Fuck yeah, I’m scared. I’m scared of a lot of things.”

“Like what?”

“Snakes.”

“Jake….” He’s stalling.

“Okay, sorry. I had to say it.” Then his face grows serious. “I’m scared,” he intones, holding my gaze to drive the meaning in deeper. “I’m scared of not being enough for someone like you.”

I raise an eyebrow, not understanding the meaning behind the words. Or his facial expression. He looks… confused? “Like me? What are you talking about, Island Boy?”

“You’re just… you’reyou, if that makes sense, Island Girl.” He puts a careful intonation behind the words Island Girl, smirking. “You’re strong and independent. You don’t need a man in your life to be okay. That makes me have to be so much more to keep you.” The corners of his mouth twitch into a half smile. “That scares me.”

I kiss him then. It seems appropriate, and then we’re falling, just like that first night. Rolling around in the sand isn’t the best idea, because then it gets in my lungs and my laughing turns to coughing. And I fucking choke and nearly die, right there in the arms of the man I love.

“Are you okay?” he asks after I catch my breath, looking worried as fuck.

“Yeah,” I say while inhaling deeply—essentially a bad idea because I think it made the sand go down further. I’ll probably be getting a lung infection from this whole unnecessary event. “I don’t know what that was about. Sorry.”

“That’s okay.” He isn’t letting up and goes back to kissing me.

He can’t get enough. And we’re going to have sex on the beach despite my fears of the sand. I’m living. I’m letting go and doing what I want for today despite planning.

“Holy fuck,” he says roughly, looking at me in surprise when I reach for the button of his jeans. “You said you’d never….”

“I know… but I’m Island Girl now,” I pant, crawling on top of him, closing my eyes as I grind into his hardness.

My life doesn’t suck.