Page 48 of The Deadbeat DILF
I picked up my phone and pulled up my messages with Robert. We barely texted each other during the day because we were so busy, but my thumbs hovered over the screen, ready to type all the questions swirling around in my head.
Did he really cheat on his ex-wife? What had actually happened in the divorce?
But I didn’t text him. This wasn’t the kind of conversation to have over text. I needed to hear his answers in person—to see his face and know if he was lying.
I curled my hand into a fist.
Robert couldn’t be a liar. He couldn’t.
I felt nauseous for the rest of the workday, but I tried to focus and do my best. When the end of the day finally arrived, I thought I would feel some relief. Instead, I felt scared.
What if Mike had lied to me? Seeing his father with someone new might have made something snap, and he could have said anything to tear us apart.
But then I thought about the Mike I knew in college. Yes, he’d been reckless—the type to drive too fast, or drink too much at parties. Sometimes he’d tell small white lies. When he was on the phone with his Mom, he’d pretend he was eating healthily when I knew for a fact he was living off a diet of pizza and beer. He’d lie to professors and say his computer broke, in order to get an extension on his assignments.
But as far as I knew, he’d never lied to me. He’d never done anything malicious.
Stupid? Yes. Purposely cruel? No.
I would have to hear the truth from Robert. Now more than ever, I needed to stay calm and level-headed.
If only that were as easy as it sounded.
When I entered my apartment, I heard Robert moving around in the kitchen, the smell of stir fry filling the air. He greeted me normally, saying the food would be ready in ten minutes.
“Great,” I said, hoping my voice sounded normal. “I’m going to get changed.”
I was grateful for the excuse to hide in my room. As I took off my blazer and blouse, I tried to shake off everything that had happened that day. But when we were seated at the dining table, eating together, my stomach churned with every bite, despite the fact that the food was delicious.
“Is it too salty?” Robert asked from across the table, his brow furrowing.
I realized I’d been slowly chewing the same bite for way longer than I needed. I quickly swallowed, almost choking. “No, it’s fine.”
My voice came out strangled, making his frown deepen. That didn’t help.
“It’s good,” I assured him before finishing my bowl, pushing past the nausea that had haunted me all day. “Thank you.”
Robert nodded and took my bowl. “I’ll fix you a bowl of leftovers for tomorrow.”
I merely nodded, my eyes trailing him as he headed into the kitchen to wash the bowls. Then I caught myself. What was I doing? Inspecting his every move as if I was waiting for him to mess up and prove Mike’s damning words right?
Relationships were about trust. Despite everything that had happened today, I trusted Robert. I’d trusted him enough to cry in front of him, to let him see the most vulnerable sides of me.
Yes, Mike had planted seeds of doubt in my mind, but now that Robert was right in front of me, I couldn’t bear to ask him about the accusations. Maybe Mike had his own interpretations of the past, but that didn’t make them the truth.
“Did you have a good day at work?” Robert called from the kitchen.
“It was a bit stressful,” I admitted. “Sorry I’m not very talkative today. I had a lot going on.” I didn’t want to lie to him, but if I mentioned anything about Mike, any chance for a peaceful night would implode.
“Don’t apologize,” he said. “Do you want to have an early night?”
“I wish I could, but I’ve still got some work to catch up on.” That was the truth, at least. I’d been so distracted that I hadn’t finished everything for the day. “How was your day?” I asked.
“Same old,” he said, putting the leftover stir fry into the fridge. “I think some of the guys know I’ve got a girlfriend, though.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah,” he said, with a guilty smile. “Apparently I was grinning to myself like an idiot.”
