Page 102 of Screwed
He leaped out of his seat and called her again. “Callie! Wait!”
He barreled after her, through the office, then smack into Jose who’d just stepped out of the elevator.
“Whoa, man.” Jose grabbed him by the shoulders. “Where’s the fire?”
“Fuck, get out of my way.” They did that dance, where he moved one way and Jose followed, then the other. Finally, he shoved Jose aside, but the elevator doors were closed. “Shit!” He slapped a hand on the wall and dropped his head.
“What’s going on?”
Ignoring Jose, he turned and bolted down the hall to the stairs at the end. He shoved through the door and clattered down three flights of concrete stairs, emerging at the back of the building. He glanced wildly around. She must have parked out front in visitor parking. He set off at another run along the sidewalk, around the corner, past big pots of palms and bright flowers. As he rounded another corner to the front of the structure, he saw Callie’s car squeal out of the parking lot.
“Fuck!” He paused, hands on his hips, panting. He dropped his head forward.
She loved him.
He almost couldn’t believe he’d really heard her say that. He’d sat there in stunned silence listening to her. Christ. Did she really love him? He closed his eyes at the elation that burst like sparklers in his chest.
He needed to get to her, to tell her he loved her, too. Urgency gripped him, and he started toward his truck. Wait. He had no keys. Jesus.
He jogged back into the building, this time taking the elevator.
On the ride up, his happiness dimmed.
He’d hurt her.
She said he’d hurt her. And he had. Badly. Not only by acting like he didn’t care, by pulling away and letting her think all he’d wanted was sex…but most importantly, he’d hurt her by not putting her first.
He’d loved her forever, and he’d lost her because he’d been too stupid to put her first.
He was a fucking idiot.
He walked back into his office at a slower pace.
For months he’d been racked with guilt about what he and Callie’d been doing, worried about being loyal to his friend and business partner. So he’d messed around with Callie, knowing they shouldn’t but unable to stop himself because, God help him, he loved her more than anything, and in the end he’d hurt her out of allegiance to his friend.
As he stepped into his office, he thought about his father. About their meeting, and the things he’d said. He sank into his chair, staring blindly at his desk.
Maybe love and fidelity weren’t as black and white as he’d always thought. Thinking about his own feelings for Callie and the guilt he felt because she was Beau’s ex-wife made him wonder how complicated his father’s feelings for his new love had been. Had he fallen out of love with Mama, and into something deeper and more powerful with Breena? Had he found it as impossible to stay away from Breena as Cash had found it to stay away from Callie? Had he been as racked with misery and guilt about what he’d done as Cash had?
Dad had still cheated. Maybe there were shades and layers to the story Cash was only now mature enough and selfless enough to understand.
Right or wrong. Black or white. There was so much in between. Beau and Callie were divorced. Callie’d fallen in love with him. And he loved her, too, beyond anything. He always had. He always would. Even though she was his friend’s ex-wife…was loving Callie really so wrong? Didn’t they deserve to be happy? After all, it was Beau who’d cheated.
He’d been determined he wasn’t going to be like Beau or his dad. He wasn’t going to betray people he cared about. But in his determination not to be that guy, he’d failed to see…he wasn’t.
He’d been worried about losing Beau as a friend. But really, their friendship had changed the day Cash had caught Beau cheating on Callie. They still got along as business partners.
Until this morning, when he’d confessed his sins.
Beau had been fucking pissed, and Cash didn’t blame him. By the time he’d cooled down and returned to the office, Beau’d been gone, so they hadn’t talked, and Cash had no idea what was going to happen with them.
Friendship was important. Business was important. Loyalty was important. But Callie was the most important thing of all. She deserved to be put first.
His gut churned remembering what she’d said. Nobody had ever put her first—not her parents, not Beau, and now not him, either.
God. He tipped his head back, his chest burning.
How could he show her how important she was to him?
