Page 67 of Wild Thing
“I guess,” I murmur. “I was so unhappy with Zack… so dissatisfied with how my life was turning out. Brax was like–like a lifeline. A sign."
“How so?”
I pressing my thumb harder into the palm of my hand, desperate to feel something—anything, even physical pain.
"Have you ever met someone who makes life feel like it’s in high definition?" I ask. "That's what Brax is like for me. When we first broke up, I mourned our relationship for months, maybeeven years. I never got over him. I also didn't think I’d ever see him again, so when I did, I just… I didn't want to let him go."
Dr. Crowe remains still and quiet. A sign for me to continue spilling my treacherous guts.
"My life with Zack was so stifling. Controlled. Isolating. Everything was planned, predictable. I felt unsupported. My spark was fading. Maybe I was borderline depressed, I don't know."
I reach down beside my chair and retrieve my emotional support water bottle, before continuing.
"But Brax… this sounds really fucking cheesy, but, he jumpstarted my heart. He made me feel alive," I huff a small laugh out. "Which is ironic considering that I now feel fucking dead inside."
"It takes guts to admit that."
Maybe therapy is working. I might actually be evolving. That would be nice.
"So, tell me. What happened next?" Dr. Crowe asks.
Oh boy. Here we go.
Nineteen
DYLAN
Wednesday
Ishould've been paying attention to the panel discussion underway, but instead, I had spent the last ten minutes staring at the text from Zack.
Why are you ghosting me?
Guilt swirled around my stomach.
What was I supposed to write back? That I was falling for my ex again and had the hottest phone sex last night? I couldn’t tell him the truth—obviously.
But I didn’t want to give him false hope either. Surely, after everything, he knew what was coming.
Hadn’t I been clear enough? Isn't my radio silence a dead giveaway?
Taylor leaned over her armrest. “I don’t understand why you won’t just put him out of his misery.”
I shrugged my shoulders, blowing out an exasperated sigh. “Isn’t breaking up with someone over the phone a dick move?”
Her eyes flicked to me. “So’s having an affair with your ex.”
Her sharp words made me wince. I walked into that one.
The shame swirls became knots, turning my insides into a tangled web as I typed out another lie.
Sorry, I've been busy. Also, I told you that I needed space. Please respect that.
It was blunt. Possibly a little too insensitive.
God, if I received a text like that, I would be hellbent on finding out what the fuck was going on.
But I knew Zack didn't have it in him. He'd be shitty at my response, sure, but he wouldn't try any harder.
