Page 123 of Beating Heart
“This is why we aren’t together, Nash. You’ve never understood me.”
I chuckled. “Clearly, I still don’t.”
I held my hand up and caught Midge’s attention. A sense of relief came over me, because I knew this was almost over.
She wasn’t going to fight for my boy.
When it came to being the parent, I’d always been the only one to fight for him.
And that would never change.
thirty-two
. . .
Emerson
My parents’ house was the equivalent of Disneyland by way of being the happiest place in the world. There were always lots of people, lots of chaos, and lots of food and drinks.
My aunt and uncle lived next door, so it was always a big party over here between their two homes. The boys all lived on their own in town, but they’d come over last night to see me, and they’d be here tonight. Sunday dinners were kind of a staple at the Chadwick home, even if a few of them tried to get out of it now and then.
Coming home was exactly what I needed. I’d avoided Rosewood River for months because of the embarrassment over the wedding being called off and the whole town knowing the dirty details of what went down.
Turns out, I didn’t really care anymore. That felt like so long ago now.
It’s funny how life worked. Something could feel so big, until the next big thing happened, and then you didn’t remember the last thing.
I had fallen in love with Nash. A real, deep, soul-crushing kind of love.
It was different from the love I’d experienced at a young age.
This was real. There was no doubt in my mind that Nash Heart was my future.
And Cutler Heart… he was mine, too. Maybe not in the traditional sense, where I’d gotten to start out with him on the day that he was born. But he was mine in the way that mattered.
My mom and I had hashed it all out, and she’d helped remind me what was most important.
“I’m glad you finally found the real deal, sweetheart. Because I always worried that you were settling.”
“Why didn’t you say anything?”
“Because you were so confident about him being the one. And Collin was fine—well, before he did what he did.” She chuckled. “But I never saw that excitement. That deep love that I want each of my kids to experience.”
I nodded. “Yeah. I’m happy that I finally understand what you’re talking about.”
“So don’t let a woman who barely plays a role in her child’s life take away from something so special. It’s rare to find it, and you have to fight for it.”
“Yeah, even being away for the weekend has made me realize things.”
“Tell me.”
“Well, I used to be so determined to work at the best hospital in the country, and I wanted to put in the hours and prove something—I don’t even know who I was proving it to.” I shrugged. “But now, I realize that I like having a life. I like going to work and helping kids feel better, but I like coming home. I like having dinner with Nash and Cutler. I like swimming in the lake and walking to the diner.”
She squeezed my hand. “You’re finally living, Emerson. And you like it. You’ve been living for work, because your personal life wasn’t that fulfilling.”
I laughed, even though it was true. “I want to have a family. And I want to hang out with friends and throw parties for Cutler and go to baseball games and read him stories at bedtime.”
She smiled. “Have you talked to Nash?”
